Hi sunshine,
Finalising projects, preparing for holidays to spend time with our family to feel enriched and loved?
Did you know that one in five married couples are considering separating from their partners after staying together over the festive period, according to a poll of 2,000 spouses by a legal firm Irwin Mitchell.
Apparently, “more than 1.8 million couples will have contemplated divorcing their partner during the Christmas period,” said the Family Mediation Helpline press release.
Yesterday I was interviewed on BBC on this very topic. I shared with them 5 key strategies to keep relationships solid over the festive period. Here is a brief summary for you:
1. Breathe in together. I am serious on this. Have you ever noticed how your partner is breathing? Tuning into their breathing changes your neurology and tunes into their ‘world’. Not only will you better understand each other, but also, you don’t need to use words. Just look into each other’s eyes and breathe deeply. It works wonders. Click here to learn more.
2. Share 5 positive thoughts with each other. Every day. Concentrate on what you feel grateful for. Even little things count.
3. Imagine if you were in the process of dating again. Yep. You can do that. You can imagine you want to seduce them. Use all your charm, positivity and wit, make an effort to show up for them. Imagination is much more powerful than will.
4. Express your feeling not your thoughts. Emotions get trapped when they are not expressed constructively. And at the time of festivities they surface.
Instead of reacting passive-aggressively, talk about YOUR feelings. Share how you feel (e.g. I feel lonely, I feel rejected, I feel not respected, I feel isolated, I feel sad, I feel scared, I feel angry, etc.). This is a magic pill to any relationship. Once we strip the judgement, underneath there is pain and hurt. Talking about that, makes the connection in any couple much stronger.
5. Create intimate moments. Beware of not talking if you are a woman. Silence for a woman is a ‘kiss of death’ in relationships. Create moments to connect, to express how you feel and just listen.
If you like the above, feel free to share!
Have a great week!
Warm regards,
Darya
